Everyone who is in any type of relationship, be it a friendship, a romantic relationship or as a member of a family, knows that there are times when issues arise and communication is key. Sometimes, however, it can be hard to push for what we want without damaging the relationship and hurting feelings. Here are some tips for negotiating with people you care about–
Beating around the bush, lying to preserve feelings or backing down isn’t advised. You love the person to whom you’re speaking – don’t they deserve the truth? Whenever you are presenting an issue or your feelings to someone you care about, being honest is key.
If you attack someone’s personality or actions, you can be sure that they will respond defensively. Even if you are frustrated, treat the person to whom you’re speaking as you would like to be treated. This means treating them with kindness; never saying anything that crosses the line and can’t be taken back. You should also avoid blaming, criticizing, giving unsolicited advice or using ultimatums.
Of course, expressing yourself and getting your point across is important. But listening is equally, if not more so, important. Really listen to what the other party is saying, think before speaking and really consider how they are feeling before replying.
Have you had success in negotiations with people you maintain a relationship with in the past? Why or why not?