Conflict is an inevitable aspect of every relationship. The important part is learning to deal with it.
There are healthy ways to resolve conflict and unhealthy ways to try and avoid it in the future.
Here are some tips to help you handle your arguments in a healthy way:
Open Communication Is Essential
You have to create an environment that encourages open communication. In a healthy relationship, both partners can speak freely about their concerns.
Both partners should be able to discuss important topics like finances, family issues and other relationship conners. A sign of an unhealthy relationships is when one of you is unable to discuss the big picture without the fear of arguments.
Allow your partner to express their concerns without fear of retaliation. In fact, encourage them to open up to you without getting too upset or defensive. And when they share their thoughts, simply listen to what is bothering them.
Just make sure you are not simply focusing on the negatives. Also, praise your partner for what they are doing right in the relationship.
Maintain Calm During Conflict
Never go under the belt and start insulting your partner during a heated conversation.
Keep your focus on the issue and resist the temptation to put your partner down with sarcastic comments. If your partner starts to curse, get aggressive, worked up, or cry consistently… then you are likely in an abusive relationship.
Irrespective of the topic, you should be able to talk to each other without yelling, cursing or making the other person feel unsafe. You should never feel under attack or have to tread on egg shells around your partner.
Address The Real Problem
Get to the root of the issue. Often, arguments are an indication that you or your partner has unmet needs.
Evaluate if there are bigger issues that have been ignored in your relationship. For instance, if your partner complains about you going out to a party, they might be indicating that you haven’t spent sufficient time with them.
Consider what your partner is saying to you and imagine it from their point of view. Is there any truth to their claims and what would your reaction be if the roles were reversed?
First, seek to understand your partner before pushing your point across.
This is part 1 of resolving conflict in relationships. Look for part 2 on this blog tomorrow.
Sheevaun Moran is a business advisor, master coach, quantum energy thought leader and the founder of Energetic Solutions. She uses business principles with energetic techniques to help more than 25,000 entrepreneurs, CEOs and leaders bring instant focus and shifts to clarity, purpose, and profits.
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